A wedding calls for many special occasions which means many special toasts. While champagne may be the typical bubbly, here’s a list of alternative libations with occasion-related names. Sadly, I’ve only had the pleasure of tasting three but would happily raise a glass to the others if I could.
1. Dearly Beloved, I Thee Red (Red Wine, California): “We’re gathered here today.” With a red macabre logo, this wine has lots of wedding references and puns all over it. I’m drinking it as a write this blog and I say it’s pretty good! Flavor is very fruity, bold and sharp. Blend of Merlot, Zinfandel, Petite Sirah, Syrah, and Cabernet Franc, from the Central Coast. $7.99
2. Bitch (Grenache, South Australia): If you’re a feminist that likes the idea of reclaiming the word, bitch, this might be your wine. Good for the bachelorette party or as a passive-aggressive gift to your future sister-in-law. Earthy, herbal, sage and garrigue-like aromas mingle with lovely rose petal and cherry scents. Smooth, ripe, flavorful, and seamless on the palate, this friendly effort is all about pleasure. $10
3. Mad Housewife (Cabernet Sauvignon): So this one does not win any feminist awards for namesakes. In fact with the catch phrase, “What’s domestic bliss without a little wine? ” I’m not sure I can get the taste of obsolescence and domestic subordination out of my mouth. Anyway, another website describes it as “Ripe cherries, mint, and mocha characterize this soft, beautiful expression of the grape. The bouquet offers an explosion of sweet preserves while the palate is delighted with the smooth, lush sensations of silky Cabernet.” Perhaps this one would be drinkable for the Betty Drapers of the world. Actually in a change of feminist heart, maybe serving this at a typical bridal shower would be appropriate. After all, bridal showers, where women give the bride domestic bakeware and kitchen utensils is completely obsolete given that women were liberated from the kitchen 40 years ago, maybe pointing out that this is “mad” is a good thing…
4. Monogamy (Cabernet Sauvignon or Chardonnay, California): Unless you believe in plural marriage, Monogamy might be for you! For a libation at a wedding, it’s a good reminder of what type of promises a couple is making. Classic Cabernet Sauvignon aromas of black olives, cassis, plum and dried herbs. Completely committed flavors of blackberry, black cherry, cassis and plum with a smooth velvety texture followed by a lingering and slightly toasty finish. Produced by the Wine Sisterhood, who pay particular attention to causes that support women. They also provide a wine called Pro+mis+q+ous, which might be aptly names for the bachelorette party too.
5. Fourplay (Chianti, Italy): While most couples have knocked boots before the wedding, this might be a good wine for a newlywed in need of direction on the wedding night. Flavors of cherry, blackberry, and licorice are accompanied by a smoky tobacco note. Under $20.
6. Honey Moon (Viognier): One of the myths to the honeymoon was that it should last exactly one month, which was the appropriate time it would take for mead to ferment into wine. “The first few sips offered tropical fruit flavors (including banana) that with more time mellowed out to reveal ripe apricot notes. The warm taste of honey on the finish not only let this wine live up to its name.” Trader Joe’s offers this wine at an affordable price $4.99.
If you have any other aptly-named recommendations, send them along. I’ll add them to the list. Cheers!